Good Morning and Happy Monday!
“‘Nagging self-doubt is the basis of so much depression.’ We’re afraid of being judged and found wanting….Know that you are accepted. You are fine as who you are. Have faith in yourself, instead of requiring approval from others, and then get on with being connected in community.”
Thomas Moore (excerpt from the forward to Out of Solitude by Henry Nouwen, 1974)
There’s a difference between solitude and loneliness. The first is a journey in which you willingly engage to discover your thoughts and their connections and neuropathways. The practice is intentional and directed toward knowing the self in new and unique ways to grow in awareness and strength. The latter presents as a struggle to belong and become, not knowing how to attract what is most desired. Loneliness is seldom a choice, whereas the choice of solitude is made with purpose.
Here are some of my favorite quotes about solitude:
“I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude.” Henry David Thoreau
“The quieter you become, the more you can hear.” Ram Dass
“In solitude, there is healing. Speak to your soul. Listen to your heart. Sometimes in the absence of noise, we find the answers.” Dodinsky
“Your soul needs time for solitude and self-reflection. In order to love, lead, heal, and create, you must nourish yourself first.” Linda Joy
“Silence is an ocean with wonderful places hidden in its depths.” Isaac of Nineveh
“Silence is a catalyst for innovation.” Mahatma Gandhi
“Solitude can be a much-to-be desired condition. Not only is it acceptable to be alone, at times it is positively to be wished for. In silence, we listen to ourselves, and in the quietude, we may even hear the voice of God.” Maya Angelou
The interesting thing about solitude is, once connected to care and compassion, an exploration of this nature can be a powerful catalyst to assuage the adverse effects of self-doubt that lead to depression. In creating space for experiencing the self and truly concentrating on the mysteries of our uniqueness, we begin to discover the various aspects of our character and personality. The practice can prove to be both exciting and upsetting. And solitude isn’t necessarily accomplished alone. Frequently, creating space in accountability groups, mental health psychotherapy, or spiritual counseling promotes awareness in a safe and supportive environment.
Sometimes, we notice unsavory elements that might be concerning or even disarming. When we’re able to reveal these components, we ultimately have a choice. We can decide whether or not we desire to engage in a path of healing, albeit challenging at times, or if we want to stay in a familiar place that has become our default.
Other times we glean an understanding of our true nature, desires, and particular gifts and talents. In these revelatory times, we position ourselves to be free from judgment and secure in our acceptance, whether from self or others. We begin to approve of our unique qualities and thoughts, allowing us to be more creative and open to possibilities.
We learn in Scripture of many times that Jesus sought solitude for guidance or to gain strength. Mark 1:35 reveals:
“Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.” (NIV)
And, Mark 6:32 notes:
“So they went away by themselves in a boat to a solitary place.” (NIV)
Many of the world’s greatest theologians, philosophers, and creative minds protect their times of solitude because the practice becomes essential. They know that connecting with their innermost thoughts, promotes freedom in expression, lends clarity to conflict and confusion, and minimizes the opportunity for self-doubt. When we choose to connect to our foundational beliefs and authentically gauge our basic needs, we remain available to innovation and relationship with ourselves and create the same space for our community.
Design and embrace opportunities for solitude this week and discover the beauty that is available in the experience!
Be Well & Be Blessed!
Lucinda
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