We are the parents of a special needs child, we’ll call her Josie, age 9. She was born with a congenital condition that requires she be in a wheel chair during the day. She attends special education classes and is doing well in her classes. Her speech is sometimes difficult to understand, but we’ve learned to communicate with her and so have her teachers. Our challenge is individuals who feel they have to overly sympathize for us and Josie. We believe, as Christians, that we were given this child to love and care for. We don’t require sympathy, but words of encouragement would be welcome.  We don’t consider Josie a burden at all. She is our beloved daughter.  Please tell folks to speak words of encouragement to parents of special needs kids rather than seeing them as overburdened. – Josie’s Mom and Dad

Dear Josie’s Mom and Dad ~

Thank you for posing this fundamental quandary for consideration! Your plea for encouragement rather than sympathy is common in this world as we continue to struggle with differences. Although the concepts of diversity and inclusion are main topics of discussion throughout the business world and among healthcare professionals, the lack of understanding regarding basic needs is underwhelming, at best.

Oliver Sacks, the British author and neurologist, spent his career discovering the miraculous properties of the brain. He is credited with the following statement, “I wish for a world that views disability, mental or physical, not as a hindrance but as unique attributes that can be seen as powerful assets if given the right opportunities.”

I imagine this sentiment resonates with you due to your commitment to your daughter’s advancement and the painstaking efforts you’ve made in assuring her success. I’m sure she has many gifts and talents that you and her teachers treasure.

In a world where we so often forget to look beyond the obvious, Christians must assume the responsibility to be light in the darkness. Psalm 19:8 teaches us that, “His teachings make us joyful and radiate His light; His precepts are so pure! His commands, how they challenge us to keep close to His heart! The revelation-light of His word makes my Spirit shine radiant.” (TPT) My encouragement to you is to continue your quest to bring understanding, acceptance, and normalcy to your daughter and others in similar situations. Your light will assist others in recognizing the unique gifts offered by our differences rather than our sameness. 

There is value in all of us reviewing Philippians 2:1-4, which speaks of Christ’s humility. “Therefore, if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in Spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” This passage of Scripture is a beautiful reminder of who we are and whose we are. It’s also a great reminder of how we must be present in the world.

I’ll leave you with one additional encouragement that seems to sum up my thoughts and offers hope:

“There is only one way to look at things until someone shows us how to look at them with different eyes.” Pablo Picasso

I’m hoping that you and others will gain confidence and understanding by looking through the eyes of Christ for illumination and reassurance.

Be Well & Be Blessed!
Lucinda