Question: My husband and I have had our little Rascal, a German Shepherd, who we rescued when he was just 4 months old. We had him trained as a therapy dog, and we spent many happy hours in hospitals and retirement homes where he would greet the patients and residents as though each of them was his best friend. He is now 14, and although he slowed a bit, we thought he was in good health. After a recent checkup at the vet, we found out that he has a malignant tumor. We don’t know whether to wait until he has health issues that are making him miserable and have him put down or just leave him alone until something like that happens. In the meantime, this is hanging over our heads, and we’re both very, very sad at the prospect of him crossing the Rainbow Bridge. Help us decide how to go forward with our little Rascal.
~ Love Our Rascal
Dear Love Our Rascal ~
I’m sad to learn that your fur baby, Rascal, is having health challenges! It’s difficult to watch our pets decline, especially when they’ve been so actively engaged in helping others. It’s a tough time, and my heart goes out to all of you.
The primary concern is for Rascal’s health, safety, and comfort. If the tumor is operable, it would make sense to remove it and extend his life and service. If it’s inoperable, hopefully, pain medication can manage his level of comfort. I’m not a veterinarian and would rely on wisdom from the professionals. It would be awful to see such a wonderful service animal and loving pet suffer unnecessarily. When all attempts at providing comfort and an acceptable quality of life are exhausted, your choice is limited to allowing Rascal to leave you.
Losing a beloved pet is traumatic and quite difficult to navigate for many of us. I remember when we had to let go of our Delilah, my family was devastated. She was such a source of joy, and we couldn’t imagine a world without her. We were all quite literally wrecked at the thought of it, but when it came to watching her suffer, we were of one mind in refusing to allow her one minute of what we knew we could prevent. It was terrible, but we went together as a family and stayed with her as she transitioned. I remember our vet, Dr. Fries, now retired, was so loving and extended so much grace to us. He was one of a kind, and we felt loved and understood.
There will be grief, and you can be sure there are also no perfect ways to grieve. What we do know, however, is that the grieving process needs to happen for our mental health to establish a new balance. This is true for our four-legged loved ones as well as for the important people in our lives.
In her book Rising Strong, Brene Brown writes, “We run from grief because loss scares us, yet our hearts reach toward grief because the broken parts want to mend.” Brown’s words suggest that the way to heal from grief is to walk through it so we can mend the broken parts. Here are some additional thoughts from an unknown author: “Grief never ends, but it changes. It’s a passage, not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness, not a lack of faith. It is the price of love.”
I’m reminded of Ecclesiastes 3:4, which reads, “A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance.” Maybe you will have to have your time to cry so Rascal will have his time to dance. I’ll be praying for your decision-making and contending for your strength in the process.
Be Well & Be Blessed!
Lucinda
